Peer Review

https://docs.google.com/document/d/1_leooR46L2Kpz2qz_Yvu2cqCVFqBiE6NBWBy-sRPDXQ/edit

Five Comments

The Best Comment I Received:
The best common that I got was from Liz. She liked that my counterclaims weren't long and were easy to understand. Liz thinks that privacy is a complex issue, and when she posts a picture online what it can mean to another. The story that I include about a spanish teacher getting suspended for inappropriate pictures online shocked her. She wondered why exactly they fired her, and that she can understand if she were actually doing something illegal. Cyberbullying was another issue that intrigued her. She questioned how I would combat and address it in my paper. Lastly she remembered of past experiences where she was cyberbullied online through hate messages, and that it's easy to break one down online rather than face to face.

The Best Comment I Gave: 
The best comment that I gave was to Shane, on his counterclaims about Smartphones. I thought that his article was really interesting, because I can totally relate to him. He explains heading to a coffee shop, and forgetting his laptop; however, since he had his smartphone he could do his business from that convenience. Although this convenience can be helpful, it can also be a distraction, which I stated. My roommate constantly is online and on her smartphone, which gets annoying. I feel like she doesn't hear what I have to say, and it's really frustrating when I want to tell her something. Shane says that not paying attention to his phone, even for a minute, helped him realize that distraction. I thought his paper was interesting, fun, and inventive.

Below are the comments I gave on five other blogs pertaining to the counterclaims. 

Simone-
November 24, 2012 12:07 PM
Eve-
November 24, 2012 3:03 PM
Korey-
November 24, 2012 3:16 PM
Shane-
November 24, 2012 3:32 PM
Justin-
November 24, 2012 3:43 PM

Counterclaims

Many people think social networking doesn't effect your privacy, but it does. The things you publish online have a great impact on what people think about you. Such as if you were to post an inappropriate picture of yourself online and your boss were to stumble upon it. That alone could jeopardize your job, without any intentions. In Marcia Clemmitt's Social Networking article states, "Bachelorette party pictures on Facebook cost Spanish teacher Ginger D'Amico a 30-day suspension without pay last January." D'Amico didn't mean to stir up a controversy with her job but she did. When you're online you must be very well aware of what could be seen online and hurt you later. 

Although physically violence is thought to be the most dangerous form of aggression, cyberbullying is just as traumatic. Online users can say anything they want about a person without being face to face, which leaves it pretty open. Thomas J. Billiterri, in Cyberbullying says The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention have interpreted online bullying as an "emerging public-health problem. Billiterri also includes stories of teens that committed suicide due to harassment. Patrick Halligan, a thirteen year old, killed himself after months of being called gay online. His father stated, "He couldn't shake this rumor." If your child is online you really have to pay attention because cyberbullying, just as physical violence, has many harmful effects. 

Being online can change your identity, even if you don't realize it. Often users change what is online to appeal to the friends they have. This in turn can make you forget who you actually are. Amy L. Gonzales and Jeffrey T. Hancock of Mirror, Mirror on my Facebook Wall state that, "Self-presentations online can be optimized through selective self-presentation, and online self-presentation affects attitudes about the self." Gonzales and Hancock conclude that this is reconstructing how people think of themselves. When online you shouldn't try to conform yourself to attract people. This can cause you to forget who you actually are.

Billitteri, Thomas J. "Cyberbullying." Are New Laws Needed to Curb Online Aggression? 18.17 (2008): n. pag. CQ Researcher Online. Web. 11 Nov. 2012. <http://0-library.cqpress.com.library.lanecc.edu/cqresearcher/>.

Clemmitt, Marcia. "Social Networking." CQ Researcher Online. CQ Press, 17 Sept. 2010. Web. 1 Nov. 2012. <http://http://library.cqpress.com/cqresearcher/document.php?id=cqresrre2010091700&type=hitlist&num=1>.

Gonzales, Amy L., and Jeffrey T. Hancock. "Mirror, Mirror on My Facebook Wall:."Cyberpsychology, Behavior, and Social Networking 14.1-2 (2011): 80. Print.

Prospectus

• What issue do you plan to address?

Are there negative effects of using social networking sites?

• What is your tentative answer to the question?

I believe there are many negative effects to using social networking sites. I think they encourage  people to spend numerous hours online instead of communicating in person, lack of privacy, cyberbulling/hurtful language, and a sense of having a different identity.

• What personal interest or stake do you have in this issue? 

I have been battling with social networking for about three years. I stopped using Facebook in February 2011, because I became way too addicted. I would constantly be strolling through pages over and over again, for no reason! It was so easy to just waste time online, and I realized how it was negatively effecting my life. I also figured out that I was loosing a sense of my own identity. I would post, or Like, things that didn't have much to do with who I really was. On Facebook you can create a different identity, and that's what I mainly disliked. I gave up Facebook for almost a year and a half, and in that time my classmates created fake accounts of me. It was really hurtful, because they were poking fun at a personal choice I had made. It also made me feel like my privacy had been violated and I wasn't even online! In the summer of 2012, after I graduated high school, I wanted to see if my opinion had changed. I used Facebook until summer was over, and then decided it wasn't worth my time. I am able to get things done more efficiently, without frivolous distractions. I also believe, I am able to get down to the roots of who I really am.

Are you being hacked?

• Why is this a controversial issue?

This issue has serious controversy. With the new age of technology we are able to access information so fast. We don't have to wait to talk in person; we can just chatt online. I think that the comfort of having communication at our fingertips is taking away from the meaning of real relationships. Although it can be helpful to have that access, such as communicating from other countries, I believe it is overused and becoming a distraction. I've tried to explain to people how this is a harmful effect for self growth, but most don't see the issue. They think that non-stop communicating is perfectly normal. What I've found is that it makes in-person socializing dull if you talk frequently online. Social Networking encourages people to spend more time online and less time in person. In August 2012 the average Facebook user was spending 7 hours and 46 minutes online. It's also allowing people to create a false image of them self. Online you can be whoever you want to be, but is that necessarily healthy? Being online also has increased privacy violations. People can hack accounts, change your page, write whatever they want, and lock you out your profile. This is a huge stress, and I've experienced it. Not being able to say, "this profile isn't mine," can effect your job, schooling, relationships, etc. Another huge online issue is cyberbullying, which has effected many teens around the world. Approximately 20% of the students report experiencing cyberbullying in their lifetimes. It also showed teen girls were more prone to cyberbullying than boys, at 25.8% vs. 16%.  These shocking numbers aren't okay. We need to start facing them and fighting against the cause of these tragic problems. Online life has become very acceptable in our society. Unless you're person that stays away from technology of all sorts, you will most likely become an addict of this new drug.

"What if this was your child?"

• Who's is the audience you're talking to?

In this argument I am going to be talking to social networking users and parents. Since Facebook has become the main source of online communication, I will be referring to it mostly. I want to get my message through to people using these sites and parents of children that use them. This is crowd of people I want to persuade, since they will be impacted most by the issues. I will provide evidence with statistics, studies, stories and personal experiences. I want to encourage parents to become more cautious of their children online life and privacy. As far as social networking users, I plan to instill the meaning of communication and the distractions that the internet can cause on relationships.  

• Sites that will help my argument....

http://www.dosomething.org/tipsandtools/11-facts-about-cyber-bullying
http://www.stopbullying.gov/kids/facts/index.html
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/07/04/facebook-study-shows-we-u_n_1644061.html
http://www.digitalbuzzblog.com/facebook-statistics-stats-facts-2011/
http://www.michaelzimmer.org/2010/05/14/facebooks-zuckerberg-having-two-identities-for-yourself-is-an-example-of-a-lack-of-integrity/
http://www.guardian.co.uk/technology/2010/jan/11/facebook-privacy
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=azIW1xjSTCo&feature=player_embedded#at=54

The Magnificent Seven

From: 
My most appreciated comment was from Robert Sappington on my article, "It's the Appeal,". He enjoyed the way I constructed my blog and the way I created key points. I use bold wording on specific terms, that I believe are important in each paragraph, and he liked it. I've only heard two comments apposing the bolding, so overall they've been a success. I think they are great eye-catchers, which many bloggers and newspaper writers use. People like them because they gave attention, instead of lingering away from the article.
    Sappington liked my advice on students involving dress code conduct. I stated, "If they have a stance on a certain issue they should be able to support it with reason and facts. I notice how the youth tend to display a statement, but don't fully realize the entire topic." He said that piece of advice was one of the best he's seen in the blogs so far! That meant a lot to me. His only critique was I could try to cut paragraphs apart, so they are easy on the eyes. Thanks Robert!

To:
I believe my best advice was to Aaron Martineau. His article was a summary about the uprising in Egypt over the internet. I thought Aaron's piece was good if it was strictly a summary, but since it was a response as well, I wasn't satisfied. He's writing was good; however, I wished he would have included more of his opinion and other information. It was sort of dry to me. I wanted to understand why it was an important issue, because if it's not important to the writer then the reader won't be interested. Even if it's not an interest to the writer, they should be able to have a voice about the subject. I think when people are able to tell the reader how it effects them, and could effect you, is when greatness happens. I think Aaron did a good job for a summary though. I appreciated his work and look forward to reading more on his blog. Thanks.

Allison-

http://thecriticalcrow.blogspot.com/2012/10/confining-elephants-how-wildness-is.html?showComment=1351025161288#c4028877197853407549

 Aaron-

http://writingassignmentt.blogspot.com/2012/10/world-wide-web.html?showComment=1351123763773#c5375984768884437590

 Shane-

http://smitrovitch.blogspot.com/2012/10/attack-of-ipod.html?showComment=1351124704296#c8548073032792943047

Simone-

http://wordwidewriting.blogspot.com/2012/10/the-truth-about-liesopened-my-eyes.html?showComment=1351125411457#c22772536297083057

Robert- 

http://robertswrittingview.blogspot.com/2012/10/recognize-lies.html?showComment=1351126290316#c7813664614331781115

Korey-

http://koreycheshire.blogspot.com/2012/10/truth-about-lies.html?showComment=1351126527261#c3479267481677220874

Karis- 

http://magictriforcepower.blogspot.com/2012/10/education-and-economics.html?showComment=1351127145030#c3000781489120832923

It's the Appeal

Small choices in our daily life, such as clothing, affect the public eye greatly. Mark Davis, a popular radio host, says that there is a tough line between what is acceptable as Freedom of Expression in schools, and a public distraction. Bretton Barber, a 17year old from Michigan high school, wore a T-shirt with President Bushes face and words spelling, “International Terrorist.” Barber didn’t intend to stir the pot, but with a shirt like that he did, and he was forced to turn it inside out. Is stating an opinion in school wrong? I believe that was Barber’s thoughts, in his argument. Davis states, if he had wore a shirt less descriptive such as; “Shoot for Peace,” or “No War,” the schools probably would have said nothing.

Appropriate?

            Restrictions on school clothing aren’t a current invention; they’ve been around since you could choose what to wear. In the 60’s a case struck a huge revolution for students freedom on school premises. John F. Tinker, Mary Beth Tinker, and their friend, promised to wear black armbands to protest the Vietnam War. The school told these kids, that they couldn’t wear them and they retaliated. The very next day they were suspended, and later it was taken to the Supreme Court in Tinker v. Des Moines. Winning, the court concluded that, “students did not shed their constitutional rights to freedom of expression at the schoolhouse gates.”

MaryBeth and John F. Tinker

However schools have the right to set dress guidelines. Students can’t protest their opinions at school about a certain belief. They also can’t dress according to that opinion if it’s disruptive. This is the word that stumps most students. How are my opinions distracting students? If you were publicly protesting a certain belief, which causes students to notice, that would be considered disruptive explains Davis. But if you are, “silently,” protesting, such as the Tinker’s, then the schools really can’t say anything.

             Although Davis is slightly torn between freedom of expression and school polices, he does state that, “Passionate debates on controversial issues is good for students and should be encouraged.” This I agree on. I believe that debating with young people opens their minds to all possibilities. If they have a stance on a certain issue they should be able to support it with reason and facts. I notice how the youth tend to display a statement, but don’t fully realize the entire topic. They wear apparel without understanding what they are actually publicizing. I can remember students at my high school getting in trouble for wearing Rogue sweatshirts or marijuana T’s. Since schools are a public place where drugs and alcohol are illegal, they have the right to make students abide by these regulations. But when it comes to political choices the schools have to keep neutral. Facility can’t persuade their opinions upon students, and students can’t persuade their opinions on peers. However, debating amongst each other should be encouraged. Public schools are a place for learning, socialization, and personal growth. To hinder any of these opportunities, I believe, would be against any schools goal. Making these standards is to protect the overall safety of students and to limit disturbances. 

Do We Need It?

Can you imagine the world without the Internet? Can you even fathom not using Facebook or Twitter to consolidate your life, or actually having to pick up a book to find desired information? Well, according to Hany Rashwan in, “Communication Key to Egypt’s Uprising,” the thoughts of getting rid of the Internet are close to his mind.

Egyptians in Protest for Their Rights 

            Rashwan believes that the Internet is freedom, and having that chance to be free, whoever you are, is essential. He claims when he heard a statement by Wael Ghonim(a Middle-Eastern Google executive who started the Facebook group protests), “If you want to liberate a government, give them the Internet,” he was chilled. Rashwan is mesmerized with just how lucky we are to have steaming information at our fingertips, and that it’s free! He talks about it as a form of democracy. You can convey any image you want about yourself online, even if it’s not socially acceptable, and it’s considered okay. 

            This invention has empowered people Rashwan says, and when Egypt’s Internet was taken down engineers at Google and Twitter came up with ways to have the unspeakable voices heard. He believes that it’s this sort of connection, no pun intended, which is bringing nations together.

            I do believe that the Internet can bring people together, but I also think that it has caused many problems for us worldwide. This addiction to technology is what has me weary on this subject. The point I want to communicate is while the Internet is fascinating, and partly needed for in this society, is it really necessary?

1969 Computer 

            It’s crazy to think that this global tool, we use today, has been in the workings since 1969. That email wasn’t even created until 1971, by Ray Tomlinson. The Internet seems to have mysteriously popped up, and we hardly realize the time that was put into creating it. The World Wide Web in 1989, the first webcam in 1991, and Google in 1998. I think at this time people were really focused on making the web for informational and educational purposes, and once the twenty-first century hit, it got way too fun. 

            With all the time you can spend searching for new music, looking up videos, chatting, and uploading photos you loose the part that makes us all human.

            When I was six I was outside playing in the forest, and now at six we have Facebook accounts. I believe children at this age especially should not engage in Internet use. I think it erases the precious time that is needed to play, create and most of all imagine. Why imagine when everything is already online for you to read or watch about?

"What should I post today?"

            Along with the Internet taking away childhood development, I believe it's also a resulting factor of obesity rates and health issues. In a study published by the Washington Post it showed that music, television, Internet, and other media use were having a negative effect on children. The correlation between childhood obesity, drug use, ADHD, lower academic achievement, tobacco use, and even early sexual behavior were very strong. The data viewed a modern child at spending 45 hours a week using some form of media. That’s a crazy amount of time to be spending in virtual reality.

            So when Rashwan says, “that the Internet is bringing people together”, I disagree. I think there is much more to be know about the effects of all media use. But, as it stands, I believe it’s having a negative reaction to the human race. 

Delusion in Reality

Lying is so embedded into our life, and we don't even realize the effects of it. The act of delusion has blown me away. Being able to take away the facts, that answer vital reasons for our actions, is priceless. This skill is incomparable. But, is it a good skill?
     The main example that Stephanie Ericsson gave in "The Ways we Lie," for delusion is alcoholism. People who believe that the challenges in their life are legitimate reasons for drinking are wrong. This reason I see a lot in people. They want to avoid the actual problem so they use something to buffer it. I can remember my best friends parents used to take care of this troubled teenager in their church. He had a hard childhood of drugs and abusive parents, so they gave him support in order to reconstruct his life. They found him a house to live in, the mom gave him lunch everyday at school( even though he was old enough to make his own), lent him cars, etc.
      Even though this young adult was given all the potential to create a better life for himself he kept giving up or lashing out. He would get back into drugs, tell the mom what my best friend was doing at school( or who she was talking to), and then retaliate against the mom all over again. The dad finally started being more firm with him, but the mom just keep on giving him chance after chance. My friend was deeply upset at the delusional actions that her mom was making, but of course her mom couldn't see them. She was being used!
       Delusion strikes us all in ways we can't quite understand. We have to have the realization of the situation before we come to terms with what is really happening and why.

Stampeding over Zoo's

While many people enjoy the adventures of Zoo life, others don’t realize the life-threatening experiences these animals must endure for entertainment.

What about Those Crucial 1,000 Square Miles?

        According to “Let the Zoo’s Elephants Go,” by Les Schobert, the Smithsonian Institution National Zoo is a disgrace to wildlife. Several elephants have been euthanized due to foot pain and arthritis. Schobert’s career started 35 years ago, and since then there is much more understanding for animals in captivity. He goes on to say, that keeping elephants in restrained spaces weakens and tears apart their legs and feet. In order for healthy elephants to survive and reproduce they need to live in herds for social engagement, and be surrounded in a wide-open range of 1,000 square miles. Elephant’s in captivity gets no more than 2,200 square feet. Zoo’s wonder why their precious exhibit animals are having to be euthanized. Schobert states that this is due to improper living circumstances. The Elephant Sanctuary in Tennessee allows these animals to run free in 2,700 acres of natural environment. This sanctuary has brought elephants back to health from foot and joint diseases, after spending years in either zoos or circuses. 

Feet Diseases

            Schobert concludes that zoos have the chance to restore their animals back to health and that, as public citizens, we shouldn’t demand other expectations.

            I agree with Schobert. These animals need extra care to be raised healthy and to carry on the generations. The conditions these elephants are being put through, for entertainment, aren’t healthy.  They need wide open areas to roam and a herd to socialize with, and sanctuaries across the world are giving them that chance.

            Tennessee has one of the nation’s largest natural habitats for elephants. Its goal is to provide land for these creatures to run free, veterinary care for the sick and injured, and to give elephants a chance to live naturally. This sanctuary holds, to this day, fourteen elephants. These elephants are happy to be in a habitat like home and with others of their own kind to engage with.  They stay active unlike in zoos and circuses, because cages or chains aren’t their dwellings. The forest floors, of this natural habitat, repair injured elephant’s legs and feet, from limited space in the entertainment business. The public can still view these amazing animals, while being educated about crucial issues involving their species.

Map of the Elephant Sanctuary in Tennessee

The Born Free Foundation in Horsham UK is dedicated to creating projects (such as The Elephant Sanctuary in Tennessee), and giving endangered animal’s lifelong care. It’s these programs we should be supporting. They take care of animals that desperately need our help to survive. A life of living in chains and cages isn't something anyone should have to go through. I think we should heavily concentrate on encouraging programs that give nurture to these precious species.
The question, I believe, Schobert is rising is, “If we are interested in animals enough to pay to see them, then we should start caring about the way they are being treated.”